Those of you who follow my blog know I’ve avoided going to the dentist for years because of the anxiety it caused. I especially dreaded booking appointments with a dental hygienist for scaling, as that was particularly unpleasant. I used to go to the public dental clinic 2-3 times a year for scaling, because despite diligently using interdental brushes, floss, and oil pulling, I tend to build up tartar. But the more I went, the more uncomfortable I became, as the procedure was intensely unpleasant from a sensory perspective. Eventually, it reached a point where my body couldn’t handle the physical strain anymore, and I briefly thought I’d developed a phobia of dentists.
Finally Had to Book an Appointment
I was fully aware I was just postponing the inevitable by stopping the scaling, but I couldn’t bring myself to do it! The thought of the sensory discomfort I’d experience at the hygienist’s filled me with dread. But eventually, my teeth became problematic enough that I was forced to book an appointment. Needing urgent care, I chose a private clinic, and I made sure to mention my dental anxiety when booking, hoping they’d take extra care. And let me tell you, I was anxious!
I Felt Absolutely Nothing
Imagine my surprise when the hygienist at the private clinic started working and I felt… absolutely nothing! At the public clinic, I’ve been in so much pain that I constantly needed breaks and wanted to scream, even with anesthetic. And then, suddenly, the hygienist said he was finished! Seriously? I thought the treatment hadn’t even begun. I almost—almost—found it a little relaxing to lie in the dental chair and have the tartar removed, as it was almost completely painless. The only thing that hurt a little was the injection, but otherwise I felt nothing!
Completely Astonished
When I told the hygienist this, he replied that that’s exactly how it should be when you’re properly numbed. I was completely astonished because I had no idea! I’d been a patient at the public clinic for over two decades, and I was always told that some pain during scaling was normal, even with anesthetic. I actually thought there weren’t even anesthetics that could block the pain I felt. But now I know there are different types of anesthetics, and the public clinic likely didn’t give me enough, or didn’t wait long enough for it to take effect.
Feeling Misled
If only I’d known there were other options! I’ve been misled all these years by the public clinic into believing that anesthetic doesn’t help much, and you just have to endure the pain. I also have autism and have recently come to understand that I experience tactile hypersensitivity in certain areas of my body. That’s why I was sedated when I had a colonoscopy a couple of years ago. It’s not about it just being “a little uncomfortable”—it’s completely unbearable! Now I know, for sure, I will never visit the public dental clinic again, as my dental anxiety would return.
Tired of Assumptions
Visiting the private clinic has made me even more frustrated with hearing that autistic people’s fears usually have psychological explanations, like a fear of losing control, or associating the anxiety with something else. But for me, the fear isn’t about anything other than tactile hypersensitivity! Besides dental anxiety (which is now completely cured thanks to the anesthetic!), I also suffer from severe emetophobia—a fear of vomiting. And I’ve been told that people with emetophobia and dental anxiety are afraid of losing control; that the fear of vomiting is that loss of control! And that the fear of vomiting is irrational.
It’s About Physical Sensation
I’ve always thought those claims sounded strange, but now I’m even more convinced that, in my case, it doesn’t involve an irrational fear that can be worked through with CBT. I’m 100% certain that I’m not afraid of losing control—I’m just terrified of sensory discomfort! The reason I’m terrified of vomiting is that it feels completely unbearable, purely physically. The discomfort is so strong that I’d rather die than vomit! That might sound strange to someone who doesn’t experience perceptual sensitivities, but I can’t stand the physical sensation. It has nothing to do with a fear of losing control! If the sensory discomfort were reduced, I wouldn’t be afraid of vomiting at all. The fact that my dental anxiety disappeared with the right anesthetic is proof of that. Now I don’t associate the dental chair with any discomfort at all.
It’s Not a Luxury, It’s a Need
Stop minimizing autistic people’s sensory challenges. If you don’t experience sensory hypersensitivity yourself, you likely don’t even know what it entails. It’s easy to dismiss our reactions and say they’re all in our heads, but sensory differences are a fundamental part of autism. Being afraid of sensory input isn’t irrational—it’s perfectly rational to be afraid of something that causes extreme discomfort. Being seen and understood, and receiving care tailored to our individual needs, isn’t a luxury—it’s a human right!
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